A note to Jillian

Sweet Jillian,

I can’t imagine this is a note you will read or understand until you’re older, but then again, sweet girl, what do I know?  You are certainly wise beyond your almost-first-grade years. 

I met you only recently, but I’ve heard your name quite a few times this year.  You have a connection with my girl, my daughter, my precious Olivia.  And she has a connection with you. 

And while that may sound like a simple thing, “friendship” among elementary-aged girls, with visions of running on the playground together, playing in centers together, laughing at lunch, inviting one another over for birthday parties… well, I see through different eyes now.  You know that my girl isn’t like the rest of your friends, so a simple thing like “friendship” is quite a bit more complicated.

And, if I’m being really honest, sometimes it’s quite a bit more heartbreaking. 

I may see through different eyes, but I still have a longing in my heart for my child to have friends.  To be a friend.  Oh, I know that there are so. many. people. who love my Olivia.  I bet everyone at school knows her name.  She’s the one in the wheelchair, the one who sings and claps and simply does as she pleases without much thought to even the simple social expectations of elementary school.  Yes, she is loved.

But, she’s never really had a friend.  A friendship.  A girl close to her own age to giggle with, to dance with.  Someone to share stories with, even if the stories are only told through smiles and songs. 

And then there you were.

Olivia’s friend.

Olivia and Jillian.

She looks for you, seeks you out among a crowd.  I’ve seen her reach to touch you.  She doesn’t do that to many people in this world.  She’s wanting to connect. Olivia may not be able to tell you that she’s happy to see you, but there’s no doubt. Just as there’s no doubt that you are happy to see her. 

You are so gentle with her.  You let her lead, you give her space, you are selfless in your friendship.  You are a treasure.  I want to be just like you when I grow up.

Do you know? Do you know that you’ve changed her world? My world? You have given me hope, sweet child.  As breathtakingly lovely as it is to watch the two of you together, to know that you want to spend time with her, that she wants to spend time with you, that you two are connected somewhere in your souls, my hope lies beyond even that.

The hope you’ve inspired in me is a hope of tender love. You’ve reminded me that there is compassion and wholehearted sincerity tucked into little spaces of this world.  You, sweet child, through simple gestures of grade school friendship, have given me hope that there are others, many others, who will see my girl the way you do.  Your love is pure. Simple.  Christ-like.

I am thankful to God for you and for the blessing of your friendship with our Olivia.

Thank you, Jillian, for your precious heart.  

Love,
Olivia’s mommy